This Blog Is Officially CLOSED. . .

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Short-N-Sweet

Just a quick note to let you know I'll be gone for a short time. Too much going on at work and my blogging needs to take a back seat for a little while. I'll be back before the Holidays, I promise.

HUGGSS!!

Posted by Lauren :: 6:34 PM :: 8 comments

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Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Thought For The Day. . .






Happy Thanksgiving to all you Turkeys!!!!
Love Y'all!!










Posted by Lauren :: 7:58 PM :: 9 comments

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Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Dear Fast Food Sales Representative. . .

. . . I realize for our state's minimum wage of $6.85/hr, I cannot expect a PowerPoint presentation of my menu choices or any free upgrades. However, I do feel it is reasonable to expect that I will not have to compete for your attention with your Blue Tooth conversation with you friend about how "BITCHIN" your date was last night. I also feel I'm within my rightful expectations to be greeted cordially and perhaps even get a smile while you take the money from my hand that pays your wages. . . If I am wrong in this expectation, please accept my sincere apologies for wasting your valuable time and causing you any undue mental anguish. . . I'll try to be more respectful next time. . . Not that there WILL be a next time, but I felt compelled to make you feel better about yourself. . .

Also, you might wish to pass this suggestion along to the Sandwich Assembly Engineers. . . It is generally accepted that the protien portion of a sandwich (beef, ham, chicken, fish, cheese etc.) and requested condiments be evenly distributed between the upper and lower portion of the grain-based delivery substrate (aka bun). Attempting to consume a sandwich in which the proper alignment of the sandwich components exceeds 50% misalignment does not meet generally accepted quality standards and makes for an extremely messy dining experience. If this is, again, an unrealistic expectation, please accept my sincere apologies. It was not my intent to be overly critical of your work skills. . . I know you'll understand completely when the new bright red car you parents buy for you comes with one blue door. . .

Respectfully yours,

Lauren

The bitchy customer. . . .

cc: US Postal Service employees, grocery store cashiers, bank tellers, car wash attendants, pharmacy technicians and any other customer service representatives who may see this. . .


Posted by Lauren :: 9:06 PM :: 6 comments

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Friday, November 17, 2006

Having A Bad Day?

This little ditty was big here in Motown about 20 years ago. A local morning drive radio team used to play it every morning at 7:45 AM, while I was on my daily one hour commute. After all these years, I finally found it and wanted to share with all of you. I laughed as hard tonight hearing it as I did 20 years ago. . . Go ahead and click on the link, you know you want to. . . .

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4591108324303185169&q=half+life&pl=false


I feel much better now. . . .

HUGGSS!!

BTW: The song was originally recorded by "The Fools" in 1985. I have no idea who set the music to the rather macabre slide show (other than the fleeting credit to "kirby"), but it all fits pretty well. . .



Posted by Lauren :: 8:46 PM :: 6 comments

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Friday, November 10, 2006

The Week In Review

Well, boys and girls. . . This has been quite a week, hasn't it? The Dems kick ass and take names in the election and suddenly:

George is re-thinking his position on Iraq. . .

















Rumsfeld is last seen falling on his sword. . .























And George's worst nightmare is now the Speaker of the House. . . .





















Sick `em Nancy!!!!!!!!!!!


Stay tuned. . . This is gonna get interesting. . . .

I love this country!!!!!!

HUGGSS!!


BTW: If you need a good laugh, try this one: http://www.bushorchimp.com/pics.html





Posted by Lauren :: 7:54 PM :: 9 comments

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Goodbye Jack



Jack Palance, (born Volodymyr Palanyuk [Ukr: Володимир Паланюк] on February 18, 1919, in Hazle Township, Pennsylvania, USA), died November 10, 2006, is an Academy Award-winning American actor.
With his rugged facial features and gravelly voice, Palance is best known to modern movie audiences as both the characters of Curly and Duke in the City Slickers movies, but his career has spanned half a century of film and television appearances.
Palance had recently placed his Butler Township, Pennsylvania, Holly-Brooke Farm up for sale and its contents, his personal lifetime collection, up for auction.[1]
As of Friday afternoon, November 10, 2006, the Associated Press is reporting that Jack has passed away at his home in Motecito, CA.


Posted by Lauren :: 5:23 PM :: 3 comments

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Sunday, November 05, 2006

Can Ya Feel The Love???

Well, maybe we got through to a few people after all. Since our community meeting, I've had 10 calls from people thanking us for what we are doing or apologizing for the individuals who acted like a total horse's ass. . .

I had two other calls from people who think I'm a total horse's ass. . . Guess I should be happy they were moved to at least call. I think a good movement was exactly what they needed in the first place. . . I also got a chuckle when a little old man I asked to be quiet in the meeting drove past me on my walk this morning and flipped me off. . . I'm sorry sir, but I'm pretty sure yours hasn't pointed in that direction in quite some time, but thank you for the thought anyway. . .

I can only imagine what will happen when the next newsletter goes out in a week or so. I haven't heard from anyone who was too busy to attend the meeting. There should be a few laughs in that too. . . Those folks go on my; "Ya don't get to bitch if ya didn't attend" list. . .

The one truth about community service is: "If some people aren't pissed off at ya, you aint doin' it right."

Get out and VOTE Tuesday. . . Then ya can bitch all ya want. . . I know I will!!! LOL!!!

HUGGSS!!


Posted by Lauren :: 6:10 PM :: 8 comments

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Thursday, November 02, 2006

The Rules Don't Apply To Me. . .

. . . Because my personal needs are more important than everyone elses' needs. I'm special. . . I can't be held to the same standard as others, because that would be unfair. . . To me. . .
Rules are for everyone else. Rules are for people who don't think the way I do. Rules are for people who are such stupid sheep they are willing to follow them. . .

That seems to be the attitude of far too many people these days. I don't know whether to laugh, cry, scream or just go out and beat a homeless person with a crowbar. . . I'm pretty sure I won't select option 4.

Yes, last night my partner and I hosted our first community meeting since we were elected last summer. We spent countless hours of our own time looking at the the community rules and other issues that affected everyone and addressed those. . .

Now my partner and I understand why nobody else wanted the job. . . You can't please ANYBODY!!!. . . And we don't give a flyin' FUCK!!! . . . You elected us and we are going to do the job!!! GOT THAT?!?!?! We didn't take the job to be popular!! We didn't take the job because it pays so well. . . Because we do it FREE!! We took the job because it needs to be done. . . DIPSHIT!!

We talked for over an hour tonight and we're more determined than ever to make this work. . . And we will. . . Because we are the two most determined BITCHES on the face of the earth! . . .

Sometimes ya have to piss people off just to get them to pay attention. . .

We're pretty good at that already. . .

When I grow up I wanna be Yellowdog Granny!!!!

Love y'all!!!
Posted by Lauren :: 9:40 PM :: 6 comments

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