Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Furry, Noisy Alarm Clock

There has been and interesting development in my relationship with the little four-legged critter in this house. . .

My alarm is set for 5:25 AM for normal weekdays, since I need to be up long enough to ingest two cups of tea before I trust myself with any kind of personal grooming tool. A morning person I am NOT!!!!. . .

The new routine works like this. . . .

3:30 - 4:30 AM. . . Wake up having an urgent need to pee. . . Take care of urgent need and return to warm bed. . .

5:25 AM. . . Electronic alarm sounds and is quickly subjected to my fist crushing the snooze bar.

5:34 AM. . . Electronic alarm sounds again, is crushed again and something lands at the foot of the bed with a loud THUMP. . .

5:36 AM. . . Loud purring is blasting into my right ear. . . Source of loud purring is pushed off of the bed. . .

5:43 AM. . . FUCKING clock goes off again!!! Is crushed AGAIN!!!. . .

5:44 AM. . . Loud purring is now followed by pathetic yowl and batting at my right ear. . . Source of noise and irritation pushed from bed again. . .

5:50 AM. . . FUCKING CLOCK!!!!! Source of purring, yowling and batting now laying on my head. . . .

5:51 AM. . . I give up. . . Stumble to the bathroom. . . . Source of purring, yowling and batting follows to make sure I do it correctly. . .

5:53 AM. . . Pour first cup of tea (coffee pot with 24-hour timer used to make tea. . .) and turn on local news and PC. . . Stumble to garage for morning cigarette. . . source of afore-mentioned noise at my heels. . .

6:01 AM. . . Pour second up of tea, stumble to couch, sit down hoping to NOT fall asleep. . . Watch morning weather and traffic reports. . . Why?. . . Force of habit (I used to commute 25 miles each way). . . I now have a 10 minute commute on the worst days. . . Furry source of noise takes position at my feet and stares, just in case I might move. . .

6:20 AM. . . Stumble to PC, check e-mail and blogspot. . . Source of noise follows. . . Maybe answer a post or two. . .

6:40 AM. . . Stumble to shower with 3rd cup of tea, hoping I'll be swept down the drain. Furry source of noise stands guard at the door. . .

7:15 AM. . . Dress, gather laptop and other shit I need to take with me. . . Yowling begins again and source of noise trips me 3 times in a 10 ft. walk. . .

7:17 AM. . . Stumble to laundry room, put food in bowl for source of noise, batting and tripping. . . Source of noise, etc. looks at me like I'm Scrooge and shoves face in bowl. . .

7:19 AM. . . Back out of garage wondering why I didn't just feed the little shit in the first place. . .

Answer. . . I ain't the sharpest knife in the drawer at 4:30 AM. . .

And I wouldn't trade that little shit for anything!!!!

I love my furry little CC. . .

HUGGSS!!


Posted by Lauren :: 7:47 PM :: 8 comments

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